friends forever?

fuck this statement. this statement can go to hell.

recently i've just been proven wrong.

i finally know why a-used-to-be very good friend of mine did not contact me as often as he used to for this few years.

i thought he might be busy with his sch, hanging with new friends. NS, i moved to woodlands difficult to meet up or whatever. but i was wrong, since he went into ite, he changed. til now then i realised i've been a fool, i naively thought we can be back the bestest of friends when we are in primary sch til secondary. ever since i was separated into another class in sec 3, the distances between us kept growing.

drifting apart.

becos we were born in more well-to-do families, majority of us lives in a condo, he lived in HDB.
i never looked down on him. i treat him as best friends. even though ka wing speaks ill of him that he forgotten old friends already. i still hung on to hopes, eventually he will come back and hang as often as we used to be.

sometimes i tried to contact him to ask him out, he never answered. i thought he was busy.
i tried and tried.
ultimately, i was tired of tiring.

i gave up.

i never knew why he did not contact me.

i finally did now.

someone told me, he thought of us (the grp of old primary/sec friends) as childish and show-offs.

i certainly did not expect that. i think i was really smug when i was young. im not rich now. for your info, i moved to HDB some years ago after sec 4. i've changed. maybe he doesnt know that.

from now onwards, he will be just a acquaintance to me. i'll be a hypocrite and just say "hello and bye bye" in a smiley face, provided if i get to see him.

Failed my POP (passing out parade)

the result are only known this coming saturday. but i know how well i fared.

i felt feverish that day probably due to the fact of the hot weather, walking around with heavy lugguage for tt 1 bloody cab to the venue.

i lost concentration easily, did badly in catwalks, mtv, tv commercial and acting sections. even my usually strong Q&A i stuttered. nervous.

damn disappointed with myself. i guess this is the end of my modelling career. but its not the end of me. i shall take this as a lesson to change my laidback attitude. strive on my studies.

i still hope my image director give me a chance to stay on.

i guess most of my friends dont know im in the modelling line. i shall blog about the 10 weeks course i had in this few days.

anyway was kind of sad, to see the new mac donalds commercial. i was supposed to be the featured talent, very near the camera. but becos of my terrible complexion, they put me far away with other extras in other table.

the saddest thing was that they eventually deleted the scene when i expect at least to see a small bit of myself in it.

anyway, some pics of me in zara blazer.